21st January 2019

Struggling being wed? Here are 5 ways couple’s counselling can help your marriage

You’re not alone

1. You’re finally doing something about the issues

No relationship is perfect, not even in those first few months when the flush of excitement makes you thirst to see each other. Each and every one of us is imperfect and, when you get together with someone, it’s natural that some of these flaws seep into the fabric of your lives, as a couple. But, sometimes, those first teething problems – which didn’t seem to be insurmountable at the time – have settled into the foundations of your love and are threatening to destabilise everything. Going through your history with an impartial therapist helps you understand how to resolve those niggling concerns you’ve had from day one, and move on to create a newer, firmer bond.

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2. It improves communication

It may be a cliché, but communication truly is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. This can break down in times of stress, trauma or change. Sometimes, there are many things you would like to say but you fail to find the words to express your thoughts and feelings adequately. Other times, you say too much. And once the words have been uttered, they can never be retracted. A healthy style of communication is key to overcoming those bumps in the road and counselling sessions can train you to talk…and listen.

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3. It helps you dig deep

It might be scary, but, sometimes, we have to confront our inner demons – on a personal level – to live a fulfilling marriage. And, you might have to share the weight of the past with your spouse, if you haven’t yet. Therapy sessions also help you become more aware of the way you both see the world and help you both determine if these views of life are compatible. Many of the problems experienced by couples stem from divergent perspectives so talking about them will help you both find a middle ground.

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4. It strengthens your sense of intimacy and empathy

By fostering understanding, therapy sessions can be a real boon to feelings of affection and compassion towards your spouse. After years of marriage – or even if you’ve just walked up the aisle – it’s easy to take your loved ones’ perspective for granted. But, by placing yourself in your husband or wives’ shoes, you’re able to see the situation from a different place – and make different decisions; decisions which will have a positive impact on your future.

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5. It gives you a sense of support

Being married does not automatically mean you’ll never feel alone. Extreme despair can be felt in a room full of people, or even with your spouse by your side. A therapist – who is trained to take an objective point of view, for the benefit of both parties – can be that rock you need, especially when you feel you cannot talk to family or friends about those deep, intimate issues in your marriage. And, speaking to a professional will give you a sense in confidence that the advice is being given from a place of rationality – and not because of personal interests.

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Image Credits

Wedding Directory